Broadly, the book of James is addressing the sorts of conduct one ought to exemplify as a believer, as well the sorts of conduct one ought to avoid. It is a book written to believers, instructing them how to act as believers. In this context, James 3 and 4 identifies three major problem areas of conduct for the believer: confusion (3:16), wars, and fights (4:1). James clearly identifies these patterns of conduct as being at odds with God (4:3) and as being at odds with Godly conduct (3:17—18).
James asks, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?” (4:1). Quarrels and fights with others come from within us first. Contrary to popular psychology, which focuses on outward influences and behaviors, Scripture teaches that our outward sinful actions first originate from within our own sinful hearts. James teaches us that confusion and every evil thing arise from self-seeking and envy (3:16), and that our wars and fights stem from our desires for pleasure, our lust, murder, and covetousness. Our wars stem from our sinful desires for that which we lack: “you do not have because you do not ask.”
Desire in and of itself is not wrong. However, desires can be either righteous, or sinful. Scripture teaches that there are two types of sinful desires: desires for wrong objects or bad things, and desires that are either selfish or disproportionate. An example of the desire for a wrong object is the desire for another man’s wife, a breach of the seventh and tenth commandments. An example of a desire for a bad thing is wishing evil upon your neighbor, a breach of the second greatest commandant to love your neighbor as yourself.
Selfish and disproportionate desires, on the others hand, are often desires for good things, but are either desired for the wrong reasons, or the desires are too strong – that is, inordinate, ruling, or controlling desires. Therefore, the desire for a peaceful home becomes a sinful desire if it stems from pride (“look at us, we have our home in order!”). Likewise the desire for an enjoyable hobby becomes a sinful desire if it begins ruling or controlling you, if it consumes your thoughts, or if you are willing to sin to satisfy the desire. It is this second type of sinful desire, the selfish and disproportionate, that this passage in James seems most interested in addressing.
James 4:2—3 offers a clue in this regard. Verse two states that “You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask.” A desire that is so strong and controlling that you are willing to murder for it, no matter how good the thing desired may be, is an evil, sinful desire. To covet is to be consumed with desire; an inordinate desire certainly, and all the more so if that desire leads to fights and quarrels.
Verse three states that “You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” This is an example of something being desired for the wrong reasons. Implied here is that, whatever it is that is being asked of God, God would have given it had the asker approached God with the right heart condition. Why is it that God has not given me an orderly home? Perhaps it is because my desire for an orderly home stems not from a genuine concern for my family’s welfare, but from a selfish desire to appear outwardly faithful and to elevate myself in the eyes of men. Why has God not given me obedient children? Perhaps it is because my desire for obedient children stems not from the wish to see them grow in Godliness, but from a selfish desire to be free from irritation. Why has God not given me more time to pursue reading and writing? Perhaps it is because my desire stems not from the wish to serve God with my mind, but from a selfish desire to control “my own” time instead of submitting my time to God and the responsibilities he has given me toward my family.
According to James, such selfish and evil desires are nothing short of adultery: “You adulterer!” James cries. “Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God?” Christ said that it is impossible to serve two masters (Matt. 6:24), and, likewise, James is saying that it is impossible to love both the world and God. Love of the world, and all its sinful desires, selfishness, and lusts, is committing adultery against God. “Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God” James says. The act of committing adultery against God and making ourselves an enemy starts with a sinful desire, even if that desire is for a “good” thing.
Our disproportionate desires for good things are sinful and entirely our own responsibility. James 1:13 says “Let no man say when he is tempted, ‘I am tempted by God.’” Temptation does not come from God; it comes from our own evil desires. Our desires entice us to evil and draw us away from faithfulness. When an evil desire is first conceived, if left to mature in the womb of our hearts, it will give birth to sin; and sin, if left to grow, will bring us death. “Do not be deceived” James says. Temptation and desire are crafty, and if we allow it in our hearts, we may easily deceive ourselves; especially when that temptation comes in the form of sinful desires for good things.
And we know it, too. “do you think that the Scripture says in vain, ‘The Spirit who lives in us yearns jealously’?” we have the Holy Spirit within us testifying against our sinful desires, even when we attempt to suppress the truth in unrighteousness. And because we have the inner testimony of the Holy Spirit, we are all the more accountable for our own sinful desires and actions. The Scripture does not say so in vain.
Our inordinate desires are wicked. The wars and quarrels
that arise from them are wicked. God is displeased with them. Our thoughts and
actions are entirely our responsibility and arise from a hardened idolatrous
heart. They are unloving and damaging to all our relationships. They inflict
spiritual and emotional harm to those we love.This is a very serious warning.
“But,” James says, “God gives more grace.” Grace that is greater than all my sin. Greater than all my sinful desires. Greater than all the wars and quarrels within me.
Marvelous grace of our loving Lord,
grace that exceeds our sin and our guilt,
yonder on Calvary's mount out-poured,
there where the blood of the Lamb was spilt.
James does not give us a “how-to” solution for our sinful desires and the wars and quarrels they produce; he gives us a “Whom-to:” Christ. And it is in Christ that we ultimately find hope
We must go directly to God and rely on his grace. We must rely on His forgiving grace for the pardoning of our sins (Heb. 4:16; 1 John 1:8—2:2), and we must rely on His enabling grace to give us the strength to act as he wishes during times of weakness (2 Cor. 12:9—10). This grace, however, comes with a stipulation: “Therefore it says, ‘God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.’ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” To receive God’s enabling grace, we must first submit to Him. We must submit to him both in repentance and in obedience.
“Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom.” We must be broken over our sinful desires. We must see them for what they are: as wicked and displeasing to God. If laughter and joy are bought at the expense of sin, then such joy is evil, and it must be turned to mourning and gloom. Our evil desires must be purified from our hearts and minds. “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.”
God is Lord not only over our actions, but our hearts as well. Proverbs 21:2 says that "Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the hearts." If your desires, even for good things, are causing wars and quarrels with others or within your own soul, I would encourage you to humbly weigh your heart and motives against the light of Scripture. If you resist God in your pride, God will resist you. If you submit to God in humility, by God’s grace you will have the strength to resist the temptation to sin.
James 4:7-8 "Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you."